(cough) (cough) Hairball
I met up with Wendy D. for drinks. She texted me to say she would be late, so I arrived at the bar a little before her. As she walked in I thought "wow...great body." She had kind of a plain-jane face. I am certain that she would rank high on most guys' lists, but I am not really into blonde and blue, so that's why I say she was plain-jane. She wasn't really, but to me she was. Anyhoo...she ordered a margarita and this thing was the biggest margarita I've seen. It was the size of an Anna Nicole breast. Not that I have seen an Anna Nicole breast. Of course not...she's blonde and blue and I just stated I'm not into that. Weren't you listening? We were going to be there for a while.
My conversation with Wendy D was lacking something. I'm not sure what. It would pick up from time to time and we'd chat frantically for about a couple of minutes. But then there would be an awkward pause as we both struggled to find the next topic. Two minutes of chat...one minute of thinking...repeat... This actually continued for two full hours. That made it confusing to me. Were we hitting it off, but only sort of? Were we not? I had no clue.
At the end of the date we walked to the parking lot. The entire walk I was confused about how to end it. She was probably talking to me as we walked, but I wasn't listening. I hope she wasn't asking me questions or telling me that I dropped my wallet on the ground...because I missed all of that. I was too busy rehearsing our second date in my head to see if I'd want to be there for it or if she should go alone. I came to the conclusion...if she wanted to see me again, I wasn't opposed to a second date. But, if she wanted to run to her car so I couldn't get her license plate number, I wouldn't be upset by that, either.
I gave her the standard half-hug and I went to kiss her on the cheek. Now, I've gone in for kisses on the lips in the past where the girl turns so I get the cheek. And I've even gone for the cheek and had the girl turn so I got her lips. But, until tonight, I had never gone for the cheek and had the girl turn even more away from me! I ended up with my lips stuck to a clump of long hair over her ear. I "got the ear!" Who "gets the ear" ever??? I can live with "getting the cheek." But I was spitting out hair like I walked through a spider web!
My conversation with Wendy D was lacking something. I'm not sure what. It would pick up from time to time and we'd chat frantically for about a couple of minutes. But then there would be an awkward pause as we both struggled to find the next topic. Two minutes of chat...one minute of thinking...repeat... This actually continued for two full hours. That made it confusing to me. Were we hitting it off, but only sort of? Were we not? I had no clue.
At the end of the date we walked to the parking lot. The entire walk I was confused about how to end it. She was probably talking to me as we walked, but I wasn't listening. I hope she wasn't asking me questions or telling me that I dropped my wallet on the ground...because I missed all of that. I was too busy rehearsing our second date in my head to see if I'd want to be there for it or if she should go alone. I came to the conclusion...if she wanted to see me again, I wasn't opposed to a second date. But, if she wanted to run to her car so I couldn't get her license plate number, I wouldn't be upset by that, either.
I gave her the standard half-hug and I went to kiss her on the cheek. Now, I've gone in for kisses on the lips in the past where the girl turns so I get the cheek. And I've even gone for the cheek and had the girl turn so I got her lips. But, until tonight, I had never gone for the cheek and had the girl turn even more away from me! I ended up with my lips stuck to a clump of long hair over her ear. I "got the ear!" Who "gets the ear" ever??? I can live with "getting the cheek." But I was spitting out hair like I walked through a spider web!
posted by biffm at 8:58 PM
5 Comments:
I don't know what's worse, the "hairball" or "the pat".
The ear. Thats some cold shit. You should have jammed your tongue in there to teach her a lesson.
Hairball, eww! Great post.
Explain "blonde & blue" ... what's the blue part?
Smooch,
The Tart
BTW, found U via Crystal!
I just mean that I'm usually more attracted to someone who has either dark hair or dark eyes (or both). Blonde and blue-eyed girls need to be extremely pretty to catch my eye.
Well, she could have turned so you got the back of her head, but that would have taken some major controtionism. Then she might have been interesting.
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